I took a Louisville slugger to both headlights...

This is so not pretty.

This, this studying for my history exam?

Not pretty. AT ALL.

Also? I am discontent.

And my hair? Is getting cut. Very short. I can't stand this "bangs in my eyes" thing anymore.

Need a good, cheap hairstylist, stat.

Also.

Need a very, very good way to punish a cheating bastard. Not for me, for a friend. Breaking of state and local laws highly encouraged.

(I've already thought about pulling the intestines out, thank you darling, it's a very good idea.)