kelaina: (Default)
[personal profile] kelaina
So, dropping from really good, thought-provoking films like The Last Temptation of Christ, and alarming, (alright, TERRIFYING) docu-dramas like Jesus Camp, comes a disturbingly low-budgeted film that is, in fact, so low budget I could swear they've hired a former porn star as the main actress. Her eyebrows attest to this.

C Me Dance is, based on the trailer, an annoying, dialogue-filled drama emo rant from those same idiots that work for Kirk Cameron.

I have nothing against Christian films where the outcome is worth the effort. This movie isn't even worth the paper the movie tickets are printed on! And what's terrifying, it's in North Carolina.

It is disturbing to me that such a low-budget, bad-acting film is getting into theaters. This is not an indie flick, like Slumdog Millionare. It's not even going to make you think, nor is it comfortable brain candy.

To put it plainly: it's ANNOYING. The producers try to cover the craptastic acting and lamesauce makeup jobs (seriously, Satan has no eyebrows a la Angel in vamp form), with the thunderous trumpets of how badly you're gonna burn in their extra hot toaster oveny Hell if you don't fight the demons and praise Jesus.

No, really. That's the extent of it.

I've got nothing against the film except that I think it's really fucking bad, and that I'm not going to pay seven dollars to be preached to. I can go to church if I want that!

But the sheer audacity of the numbers speak for themselves. The movie only grossed 30,000 dollars on opening weekend, and opened on 150 screens. In the movie world, that's PEANUTS.

The biggest part that bugs me is not even so much the plot (although that needed some serious work), it's the acting. When I first saw the trailer (and yes, I was made to suffer that trailer in a real movie theater, not on Youtube), we actually thought it was a joke. Or a public service announcement. Or a low-budget soft core PORN film. The acting is just crappy. Maybe if they'd spent a little more time or gotten a better studio to finance it, it could have been a good film.

As it is, it was better off going straight to video.
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